Persia Black

written by Persia Black for Jahyummy.com (Jahyummyradio.com) blogs.  Check out the Website!!!


Ahem.....allow me to re-introduce myself.....


Behind this Aries female is just a regular bad ass that goes against the grain.  I like to call myself Persia Black, my alter ego if you will. (( *PERSIA= an acronym for Political, Economic, Religious, Social, Intellectual, and Artistic **BLACK= describes what I am and the beauty I posses)) I finally have the opportunity to put my thoughts out there on just what I randomly rant about. I'm always talking about Love, Life, Sex, Marriage, Kids, Religion, Work, Sports, School, Fashion, Music or anything that I personally can relate to.  I'm like the voice that says do it, when you think it could go wrong. And I'm the voice that will say what others may only think or wish they could say. I'm blunt, open-minded and got a lot to talk about so listen up!


I am introduced to so many things on a day to day basis whether I agree, disagree or just happen too overhear conversations that intrigue me (not being nosy)   I mean, technically we all are entitled to our own opinions, which is what I am here to do in this blog....EXPRESS MY OPINION and maybe just maybe add in a few other opinions if I can get some interviews going.  Hey why not, it's all fun and games and for shits and giggles...everyone should have a good debate going from time to time.  I'm not one to prove people wrong, I speak MY TRUTH and what I know, if it's something that requires a bit more research believe me...I'm on it.


This Blog is merely just a way for me again, to get my thoughts out there...I mean I LOVE getting good and bad responses so comments are welcome.


DISCLAIMER:  I curse,get angry, overly happy, goofy, into something one minute and change my mind the next...oh and even horny. Hey I'm an ARIES so ..KEEP UP WITH ME IF YOU CAN....Persian Thoughts is just the start of some freshness in this disgruntled ass world.

Open relationships may not be for you...but it's what's hot for Mr & Mrs SMITH

This Blog was written by Persia Black for (Jahyummy.com) Jahyummyradio.com  Check out the websites!!

Take it how you want, but people nowadays are either in a relationship and cheat or just indulge in dating plenty of men/women to stay afloat in this day in age. It never mattered as much to the public eye what went on behind closed doors of these not so shy celebrities but they are sure to roll a few eyes and cringe a few noses.  Although this next topic I'm going to talk about is old news, it's still rants and raves going on about them.

One of the most sexiest couples of all time hands down in my opinion- Mr. Will & Jada Pinkett-Smith!! Let's face it, back when "Summertime" was a hit and "Inkwell" had summer love sizzling we were sure to see this couple gaining more publicity then ever imagined.




To take you through the most controversial marriage in our Black American community,  I'm not going to sit and stroke the ego of those that feel this is the worst act of all man kind, however I will surely mention that they are no rookies when it comes to love.  Jada Pinkett-Smith played plenty of roles in the TV and Movie industry but the main role that stands clear is that of a Mother as well as a wife to the handsome Will Smith star of the TV show Fresh Prince of Bel Air and numerous movies to follow.  He also produced as well as created plenty of music set back in the archives.

 They are very family oriented which proves everyday with the accomplishments of the sister/brother duo in their roles as well as musical talents that are possessed.













Now back to what keeps this marriage juicy and hot, Jada was questioned what it is that makes of a successful marriage: 

"The most important aspect of our relationship is that we continue to grow together—you have to be willing to take journeys with your partner. And even our relationship has gone through bad times. But if you can survive them, you'll have an even deeper connection. What's more important, chemistry or friendship? You have to have both, without allowing one to get stronger than the other. It's all about keeping that balance."
Source: YourTango. "Jada Pinkett Smith on Love and Marriage."

This is so true and I can relate to this statement.  It also comes from building from a foundation of nothing and turning it into EVERYTHING.

Will then answers on open marriage:
"Our perspective is, you don't avoid what's natural. You're going to be attracted to people. In our marriage vows, we didn't say 'forsaking all others.' The vow that we made was that you will never hear that I did something after the fact. If it came down to it, then one spouse can say to the other, 'Look, I need to have sex with somebody. I'm not going to if you don't approve of it - but please approve of it.'"
Source: Richard Simpson. "Will: Ask your wife before you cheat on her." DailyMail.co.uk. 2/08/2005.

& Jada: We always have people that we’re attracted to that we talk about. That don’t stop just because your married. Somebody’s always gonna catch your eye. That’s real. Somebody’s gonna always be prettier than me, somebody’s always gonna be more in awe of him than me, and he gonna be like (in Will’s voice) ‘yo she really like me’ (laughter) but as far as somebody being right for us… is there somebody right for a nice night? Maybe. But somebody that can sustain our life and sustain what we’ve built together, absolutely not!”



That's as real as it gets, and coming from such a sexy individual as Jada,  my Persia's opinion it's true.  We may not all agree or like it, but when in a relationship, we can't just ASSUME that who we are with won't have some kind of feelings about someone they may have came across just by walking across the street.  Will said it, it's natural.  So the only question still lingering is who is willing to take that step and,,,,,,

open Pandora's box?  We can't knock what may work for others, and I too say be open with as much as you can to keep things spontaneous.  It may not be the main answer as to how to keep your man/woman but it sure can keep you wanting more.

Whatever it is, this highly sex driven couple makes it work for them and has what it takes to make love last.  Again, many do not agree while others want in on what could be the next hottest trend.

DISCLAIMER to everyone that may have a mind so closed they can't see past what may actually work for them, remember, people won't know what you do not tell.  So, if having sex or getting intimate with someone other than your mate or including them in your swinging life is in your bag...go for it!! It's your bedroom, not theirs.  I'm not going to sugar coat a thing, I mean, who are we to judge what you are doing or not....because 9/10 those that disagree are wishing they were in your same shoes. 

*shrugs*

What's missing in her life: A FATHER-why they are important

Being as though Father's Day is only a few days away...I felt it would be a great time to speak on this topic but it is a pretty emotional subject for me so please bare with .  First and foremost, not many of us have fathers, so I am not one to tell you how to feel about your own. I will forever encourage those to keep a great relationship with their father if you can...be it male or female.  However, with a female and her Daddy, it's just something a bit different.  Sorta like a Mother and her son. This is not me bashing NOR am I trying to put anyone on the hot seat out there.  I'd never do that....I just simply want to express how much a FATHER in a woman's life can make all the difference.

I share a rather awkward relationship with my father.  When I was a lil girl....he's all I can remember wanting to be around and be held by.  He was my knight in shining armor and I wouldn't have it any other way.  Even if he was wrong for something,  I'd stand by his side and fight for him because he was my daddy.  Never did we let a day go by without speaking to one another.  Time has seemed to pass us by and I grew a bit older and wiser.  I can say I learned a lot from him but only for what NOT to do.  I learned that the way I HAD and deserved to be treated may have came off as the opposite of what I should have been treated and was old enough to understand.  We don't speak on a regular as much as we used to.  We have had many battles and somehow always seem to come back to saying I love you usually when we speak about music (one of the reasons why I'm a die hard Michael Jackson fan) This let's me know things will be ok.  I'm very bull headed as he is to when it comes to us...I mean we're BOTH ARIES...so it's to be expected.  I understand we will not agree majority of the time...but I will never deny when he was present in my life at the times I may have needed him most but was to young to realize it.

I will say, I was a bit hurt because I never got to share the father/daughter dance at my wedding with my father.  It was an issue with our planner etc etc....but if I could just get that moment back...I'd dance until my feet fell off.  I may never know when the last time I will see him will be....but as a DAUGHTER I'm working on making everyday worth saying Hello, and I love you regardless of the time and distance between us.

With that being said....The woman I am today is from the men that have been in my life.  Whether it was my Father, Brother, Uncle, Grandfather or a male cousin, I learned that a man is very important in a WOMAN's Life especially as a child.  There's no denying that and Here's why:





1. HER CHOICE IN MEN:  A father is like the prime example of what a lil girl who later grows up wants in her future husband or man.  TRUE, but not only that, it sets the tone of WHO is worthy for this woman.  If you have a father who hasn't really taught you much other than shown actions of being in and out of your life...chances are you are a woman that may or may not suffer from separation anxiety. She may not know HOW to accept a good man because either she ALLOWS the man to leave so freely or she leaves when it feels foreign to her.

2. INDEPENDENT TO THE WORLD:  It's not a bad thing to be independent, in fact it's encouraged in many ways.  But what happens to the woman that is raised by WOMEN including friends and is content with not needing a man?  A man creates some form of stability.  Not saying go out and allow yourself to fall at every mans' feet but this goes back to ALLOWING THE MAN BE THE MAN.  It's perfectly fine to have your own, but as I've seen in many of my family members lives, again a Father from the jump sets the tone.  Whether he's a good one or not.






3. LET'S TALK ABOUT LOVE:  A mother can tell her daughter all the things necessary for the cans, can nots, wills and will nots that a young man to a man can do for her.  I mean that's fine and dandy...but Mothers seem to leave out the biggest part.  It's obvious that love can't hurt us and that it's the people and things within our life that we ALLOW or do that does.  But as a woman, loving so freely without protection to the heart is what most mother's can not tell their daughters.  How can we tell our child not to love when that's what women were created to do??  A father can show her HOW to love.  A father can explain how it's ok to love and give examples.  A father can also say it with such comfort in his voice as opposed to a MOTHER who has already been hurt.  THERE's A difference.  This is important for young girls and how they share their love.




I can always go on and on about how a FATHER can do so much for his child's life especially his daughter. A mother gives support and genuine affection but a FATHER gives Hope to become even better than the expectations of anybody else...to achieve goals worth achieving and to allow a man that is worthy of HER time to love her the way she deserves.

This is me signing out....but before I go.... to all the Single Ladies playing the father role...remember you CAN'T make him a father, only GOD and his CHILD can do that..continue to hold it down but never deny him of his child.  If he wants to be there he will be there...most men weren't raised to become fathers in their future.  xoxoxo


And please excuse my errors...i'm quite tired and going to bed now lol

What do WOMEN really want as opposed to need from a MAN!!

There sure as hell are no secrets to the wants and needs of women.  Women across the globe will contiguously go on a rant about how they want a GOOD MAN!! But the question still lurking is what do women really want and need from a man?  To my understanding...you could do like Chile (from TLC)  and have an unrealistic laundry list that would then label you as shallow OR you could work with what you have and make it right for you!!

Alright, so here's a list of 10 things that I look for in MY man and believe me, long as I do my part...he's sure to do his!!  Others may agree or disagree but again, this is what works for US as well as me getting my needs met!

1. A man of GOD....this is first and foremost.  And I don't mean he has to go to church every Sunday or anything in that manner, however I want to know when I'm ready to pray or expect him to pray for my family he is willing and perfectly able to do so!! I want him to know that GOD is his first true love and to put him as top priority before all decisions are made or even when we are at a HIGH point as opposed to our LOWS.  If this is brought up in the beginning of any relationship...the rest will follow.

2. A man that will be THE MAN! This is crucial to a point where I'm a vulnerable female at times.  Not saying I'm never strong, however, I need a ROCK that will hold it all together when everything else crumbles.  In the same breath, a man who is not afraid to admit his wrongs or what he is incapable of doing.

3. A man who is Passionate....if there is something that he may want to pursue, I will support it as long as it is right for him and our family.  He just has to have the PASSION for it.  It's one thing to dream a billion dreams & never put in any effort of making it happen, but if I can see the PASSION in his eyes, I'm all for being supportive and a motivator.  I'll be your biggest fan!

4. A family guy!! I am sooooo the family person and to have a man care so much about his own is a feeling among others that one may never be duplicated.  Family should be EVERYTHING just as God should, and when you are young and in love, sometimes a child will stir things up for better or for worse, however, a child never asks to be a part of this world! It is up to the creators to care for them just as they would want someone to do for them.

5. A man who has a BIG heart!  yeah that may sound really wack, but ya know what, without a big heart there is bound to be turmoil. You don't have to give the world, but if I see your effort, it's a win-win situation.  A man with a big heart shows me that his EGO would be up for a great fight.

6. A man who's not afraid to show his KINKY side....AGAIN because in my previous blog to the TOYS, do not take what I say out of context.  When I say Kinky I mean willing to enjoy a million and one other things than just a stationary position as well as doggy style in the bedroom....Like let's go outside, on the porch...where ever the mood is right.  Don't pass up on any opportunities cause YOLO right?!?! lol Nah but for real, As an ARIES FEMALE...boring is just NOT OUR THING.  And if you are the more dominant one...beware of the ARIES SPECIES cause they will ATTACK!

7.  A man with a SENSE OF HUMOR...It's one thing if you make me laugh...but if you make my stomach tight...legs curl because i'm trying to hold my pee in while cracking thee fuck up than that's even better.  I love to laugh and not all things are funny to me...however, my MOTTO has always been " Nobody has ever died of laughter, so LAUGH until there's no silly bones left" yeah I know that's corny but really...laughing is the greatest gift God could have given us and many don't use it to their advantage! A smile can take you a long way....

8. & 9. A man that Respects himself and is Loyal.  Ok so I have these 2 at the bottom of my list for 2 reasons.  One, in the beginning i stated I wanted a MAN OF GOD.  GOD IS LOYAL.  God is always there for us no matter what, even when we feel he has gone astray, he may have only left because our dependability has gone to MAN and not to him.  And Secondly, respects himself because out of all the men I have ever dated before getting married, they never really had respect for themselves.  It was more or less do what is HOT right now and try to fit in.  I'm all about standing out, and once a man can respect himself like a female should too, the trust, communication, everything again will be under one accord

10. A man who has trust and is capable of trusting.  I'm sure people are like wait wait, why is this last? Well to me, in the beginning of anything there is no trust there at all.  You are still filling one another out, so in my case, because I've been through situations where the man has been hurt and has caused pain also, I'd like to look at it as building that trust from the bottom up.  Trust is the root of any foundation, and well like a tree to grow you need to water it.  Relationships need the same thing when dealing with Trust.  It's delicate and needs to be handled with such care.


So there you have it, the 10 things that I have ever wanted and needed in a Man.  I'm still young and have a lot to go through, but I know that what I have presented, I have either gotten or am getting.  Being realistic with oneself is probably the hardest to do in this day in age, because everything is covered in bells and whistles.  Time to break the cycle and want for something worth while if you are planning to have a Fabulous future with a MAN and not a made up one that does not exist 

Are sex toys really only for girls when in a relationship?!?!

Before I dive into this topic please read - DISCLAIMER: If you feel what I say is out of context...do not read past this point.  I speak my mind when and how I want.  I feel I'm nothing but informative on an experiential level and just like to give my input on things that are normally discussed on a day to day basis.  I say what most are too afraid to talk about, where again if we are all adults here...it should be simple! TRUE ARIES BLOG

Now,  I'm not saying dildos in a mans booty hole is the movement...however, there are some cute lil gadgets  that a guy could use at the same time while pleasing his lady. I know some guys are like....FUCK NO!  But seriously...what would be the reason not to just try it out?  It couldn't possibly make you gay if you enjoy some extra sensation in areas that are as sensitive as your head....again, i'm not talking fun stuff for that manhole...to each his/her own if you suggest it...but I'm saying there are rings to go around the shaft etc.  I'll provide just a couple examples...and who knows maybe one of these days i'll have my own lil pleasure party for those that may want to discreetly buying some goodies =) 

For the right kinda guy! 

Now this blue toy is what I am talking about  for men.  Give it a try and see what you think. The round ring goes around the base of the shaft. there's a lil button that starts a vibration.  No reason to be nervous or shy about it...I've always believed that as open as you can be in the bedroom it will manifest into a great relationship with your partner.  Think about it...if you have the worst bedroom activity going on from head game to riding pony's don't you think it's time to change up a bit? Add some excitement? For Real...the less pleasure you get out of your love...the more cranky... irritable and not in the mood they will become.  Trust me I KNOW!!

Sexual frustration is thee worse..however if you are bored in the bedroom that could be just as bad! Being more open-minded helps bring out new opportunities and will have your communication level at an all time high!

Have some control 

Now these last 2 are more for the control of things. Either have the vibes of music reach both the male or female sensitive areas on the same beat. And then there's the remote control ring, Who wouldn't want to control their mans' sexual pleasure while at dinner, a movie or even in the car if you don't feel like using your head?!?!  There are some for women remote controlled toys as well.    I know Kandi Burroughs' ( of Housewives of Atlanta & Escape) website http://bedroomkandi.ohmibod.com/  has quite a bit of interesting toys to play with! I say go for it....if it's sex that you want why not add some extra pleasure!  Again men, don't be so hesitant to try...or at least give some extra teasing to ya lady with one of her own!!

Music anyone?

women's treasures 

"Men will change for the women worth changing for!!"

Steve Harvey really had my attention this morning...I love his goofy ass, but even more I love when he can put a MAN & WOMAN in their place.  Others will disagree cause they hate to hear the truth about themselves, but I like to keep an open mind on what he has put on the table! 


Today's Strawberry letter I didn't catch, but I remember hearing Steve say " Men will change for the women worth changing for."  Of course it could go the other way too....but some women can be so eager to change the man they are with.  I too was one of those woman, and I will tell you IT WILL NEVER WORK! I mean a common mistake that we as women make is ASSUME our men will understand what it is we want from them.  No Man will understand a women fully, and nor will a female understand men completely.  The point is to just accept them as who they are or move on...POINT BLANK(.)









Another thing I've noticed is while trying to CHANGE the person one is with, he/she may lose site of themselves.  Some people  become so wrapped up in who they are dating and that persons everyday life they  forget to make sure they are happy within oneself. I've done this...but am learning that if you really want someone to meet your standards or just change a certain way about them....BECOME AN EXAMPLE!  If you want something out of someone, why not show them exactly what it is that you are reaching for.  If you want honesty...become honest with YOU first and show them how easy it is to just say what you are feeling.  To me,  honesty can come from a feeling within...not just an action that could have previously taken place.  

Lastly,  become an example by communicating, being loyal, and anything that you could ever want in a person.  If you see first hand that someone has the potential to be either the man/woman of your dreams or just some easy fuck...then hey that's your prerogative just don't complain that he/she isn't the one for you.  You can almost tell from the jump if someone is worth your time or not.  You may not fall in love right away, but people can grow into that through the years.  




 I've once said..."if you change the way you think...you will change the way you live," in fact if you change the way you think of others, it will change your entire perspective of them as well...but do it in a positive stride.  Change is inevitable...everyone is bound to do it...if you have the patience to withstand an unchanging man or woman then you can accept the fact that it's just not your call to change them!! 

The Convenience of a Bad Habit

Many times I fight with myself over things that I know I could change in a day as opposed to in a lifetime.  My reasoning for this strictly is because bad habits make it so much more convenient to be comfortable with a certain lifestyle but later find it even harder to overcome.


Example, if you go searching for something you are bound to find it....So very true.  But if you are looking to find something knowing it will make you more upset than that means STOP correct??!!?! Eh, yeah but when you have a habit of constantly looking for things whether to find truth, confirmation, anything...your mind is set for digging in deeper.

cell phones and privacy...how far do you go?

a lil white light won't harm anyone

Say you have a friend, who is ALWAYS lying like it never fails.... they have developed a bad habit and it's sad because after awhile their mind tricks them into believing that it's the RIGHT thing to do and hey some truth may come from that lie (so they think).  Don't get it twisted I'm no liar, and that's not the case here...just pointing out some examples.







My Bad Habit had me all fucked up plenty of times...and I'm always asked well why do I do it?  I think it's part of me wanting to be RIGHT about something and to prove it as well.  This is the battle I am having...because that type of power I know i can live without...I shouldn't care about proving anything to anyone...because once I know the truth it's then the question of "What you gonna do?"

I'm really working on channeling my BAD Habits to a more GOOD one.  I want to know that if I'm being repetitive in something that it will be beneficial and not painful to my well being.  This and fear are 2 of my biggest battles that I have everyday with myself.  But I'm making a habit to look at things in a different light.

But it feels soooo good lol

Change is not always a bad thing and I'm usually receptive of it because I plan on having lots of Good Habits in my near future...

Marriage covered with SEX

In my opinion, there are 2 things that are of most concern in our generational times other than MONEY and that is MARRIAGE and SEX.... If you look at our youth today or even most people in their late 20's early 30's, Marriage is not as much a priority as it was back let's say  in the 1950's or even 60's.  To me I feel SEX has suffocated the thought of even getting married nowadays.  Sex gives the idea of control over anything possible....Hey the more sex you could have with more random people, what's the use of getting married right??!!?

I can honestly say that people have been brain washed as what they see as being the most probable way of thinking that sex is better than love.  I mean from experience, wouldn't you rather have sex with the one you could spend the rest of your life with???

Ok that seems like another fairy tale question I'm sure, but I'm saying rather than get so tied up and hooked into what the WORLD perceives as the RIGHT THING try finding what is right for YOU.  Often times, the female community will get so eluded into the entertainment world that they may never know what real love feels like, hence that puts a HAULT for them to ever consider jumping the broom because single life is the way to go.  Watching a show and expecting your life to be so identical to their reality and not your own really stops these women from ever being truly happy with even themselves.  As these REALITY women contiguously flaunt how much sex they can have enjoying the single life...what about morals set for a better future???  In the same breath....most men look at marriage as a financial BINDING as opposed to the FINANCIAL success one could acquire.  They look at the NO MORE LATE NIGHT OUTTINGS with the guys as a set back but don't realize there are beautiful women that would allow them to still BE A MAN...Roles are changing everyday I get that...but let's not exclude what a good thing could really feel like. Alright, ....enough with all the preaching...but seriously...Marriage can be just as much exhilarating and the sex could be even better but again I'm only speaking from my point of view.